“Children are among the ‘all’ that we are called to serve.”
– John Piper.
For stay-at-home-moms, it’s easy to believe that our purpose, our time, our energy, our love and affection is destined to never venture outside the walls of our home.
By the time Mount Laundry is washed, the groceries are bought, and 2,571 diapers have been changed, it seems pretty clear that “ministry” just isn’t able to make an appearance on a momma’s daily agenda.
“Ministry” seems like everything that my stay-at-home-mom-life is not.
I have been telling myself for years now that once I emerge from the at-home-all-the-time phase of life, then I will be useful and able to participate in Kingdom Work.
HOWEVER…
…What God is showing me is that my stay-at-home-mom-life is,
in fact, everything that ministry is.
The walls of my home don’t exist to keep me from the world, but to invite the world into my home. And my time, energy, and affection doesn’t end with my own precious children, but should extend to children that God brings my way.
So where is this “world” that I’m inviting into my home…and where are these children that I’m serving?
My Neighborhood.
God has given me a home in the middle of a neighborhood filled with broken people and broken families. And there are a lot of kids.
Getting to know and serving the children in our neighborhood has radically changed my notion of what “ministry” is and the part that I play in it. My home and my time are not my own…they belong to God. And He wants us stay-at-home-moms to use our homes and our time to reach neighborhood children.
Here are 5 ideas for serving and loving your neighborhood children:
1. Hire Them
Give them a shot at making money through good, honest, hard work. This kills the possibility of “hand-outs” and gives them an opportunity to be proud of something that they have accomplished.
We recently found out that a little girl in our neighborhood had her bike stolen. So to help her raise money to buy a new one, we hired her to help with odd jobs around the house. She comes over on Saturdays and pulls weeds, organizes toys, sweeps, watches the baby…she has been truly helpful!
While working, we have talked about how good it feels to work hard and the benefits that come from hard work. We have talked about jobs that she wants to have in the future and things that she wants to save money to buy. It has been so neat watching her work ethic mature.
2. Invite Them (and their parents) In
Imagine a man lost in a hot and dry desert. He has no water and he has been wandering for days. Up ahead, just a short distance away, he sees an oasis! A cluster of palm trees offer shade and water. For the parched, scorched man, the scene up ahead means life.
There are many children in our neighborhood who are like that man, searching for life and hope. But instead of hot and thirsty, they are unloved and neglected.
By opening your home, you may unknowingly have provided them with an oasis. Serving them snacks, getting to know them, and making them feel welcomed and loved can be life changing for a child who doesn’t receive much motherly affection.
In order to get to know the parents as well, have the whole family over for a Saturday barbeque. Keeping it casual and fun allows for everyone to feel welcome and at-ease.
3. Play With Them
It has been so fun playing with the neighborhood kids! We ride bikes, play basketball, and walk around the neighborhood with them. Getting on their level and being interested in what they like to do creates an instant bond.
While watching my husband play basketball with the guys, I have noticed how helpful it is for the kids to have an adult offer direction to their play. When left to themselves, bored on a long summer day, kids can invariably find trouble. But when their play is guided and supervised, meaningful relationships develop and it even seems like they have more fun.
The kids will love you for playing with them. I now believe that play is the foundation for trust…trust that you are for-real. I will never forget the day a couple of years ago when a pre-teen boy knocked on the door and asked me, “Can your husband come outside and play?”
4. Share The Love Of Christ With Them
It is heartbreaking how many kids in our neighborhood come from horrific backgrounds. Some don’t know who their fathers are; some live with aunts and uncles because their parents are in jail; some are bullied in school. They all need to know that they are loved, especially by their Creator.
I want the children to come to our home and leave fed, physically and spiritually. And doing those both at the same time seems to work really well. 🙂
Have them help you make some cookies. Tell them that they can eat as many as they want if, while the cookies are baking, they listen to you tell them a Bible story. For a hungry, cookie-lovin’ kid, it works every time. 🙂
And kids won’t shy away from questions that adults typically shy away from. Feel free to ask them if they want to know Jesus, if they want to pray, or if they want to talk more about it. Their candor is refreshing and hilarious.
5. Host A 5-Day Club Through Child Evangelism Fellowship
This may sound a little over the top, but it is so logistically simple! To host a 5-Day Club, all you have to do is get in touch with your local CEF Group, schedule a week in the summer for them to come into your neighborhood, and tell the neighborhood kids about it. CEF runs the whole thing!
A 5-Day Club is basically an outdoor VBS for all the kids in your neighborhood. The CEF staff lead the children in games and songs, share the Gospel through a story, and end in some friendly competition. It’s awesome!
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The kids don’t know it, but they come to our house because they are attracted to Jesus. They are looking for life and love and affection, and since Jesus lives in our home, that is where they come.
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I do want to offer two words of caution, with the intention of keeping you from being manipulated or wrongfully accused of anything.
1. Set Boundaries.
Once neighborhood kids know that your doors are open to them, there will be a steady stream of children flowing towards your house from then on. What a blessing! But sadly, and not surprisingly, their intentions for being with you are not always sweet. I have had a phone swiped. My husband has been asked for his watch. In other words, be mindful.
Also, it is okay to say “no.” During homeschool time, if a kid comes a-knockin’, I tell them that it’s a bad time. Sometimes my kids need to take a break, sometimes I need to clean the house…it’s okay to send them away. They’ll come back, I promise. 🙂
2. Communicate With Parents.
The best thing you can do to maintain a safe relationship with the kids is to maintain communication with the parents. If a child wants to come inside, ask for their parent’s phone number and call them, asking them if it is okay.
Knock on doors and introduce yourself. They need to meet you and your husband and kids.
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“Tis only one life, twill soon be past.
Only what’s done for Christ will last.”
– C.T. Studd
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Header photo by: David Robert Bliwas
