I spend my days at home with 4 precious, young children. Most days are simple. And sweet. Yes, there are squabbles. Yes, there are messes. Yes, going anywhere is an ordeal. But overall, the days are filled with sweetness.
Not yesterday.
Yesterday was bad.
If cameras had recorded what went on inside my house and broadcasted the footage onto live TV, I would forever be shunned by the good mommies of America.
I pouted. I hid from my kids. I cried. I begged my husband to come home from his work trip early. I was totally overwhelmed by everything going wrong around me, and I gave in. I gave up.
But don’t think it was just me. My kids were crazy yesterday, too. So crazy that I was fantasizing about what it must be like to have no kids and be able to go to Target and the gym and Hawaii whenever I want. I wanted less kids and more Hawaii.
But don’t get me wrong…I love my kids forever. They are the apple(s) of my eye…and they are so stinkin’ cute!
But that doesn’t mean that some days aren’t just horribly horrible. I’m not sure if Mother Theresa had kids, but if she did I would assume that even she had days when her kids felt less like blessings and more like parasites.
What is a mommy to do when one of those rare horribly horrible days takes her by surprise? When that ooey-gooey quote about days being long but years being short just isn’t doing the trick? When despair over her own circumstances and jealousy over someone else’s feels all-consuming?
A mommy is to set her sights on Heaven.
Heaven. My future home, safe in the kingdom under the rule of the mighty King Jesus.
Everything that is tough here will be made perfect there.
Relationships will be unselfish.
Work will be wholly enjoyable.
Worship will be unshameful.
Futures will be stable.
Homes will be safe.
Bodies will be unbreakable.
Faith will be complete.
Life will be holy.
Rest will be sweet.
Sinners will be sinless.
All will make sense.
And our joy will be centered on our King. Our Savior. Our Creator. Heaven is heaven because Jesus is there. If I am to survive motherhood – especially those rare horribly horrible days – I must set my gaze Heavenward. My joy must come from something absolutely certain and joy-filled.
I love a good motherhood quote. They are full of truth and preciousness. But my soul, the part of me that is eternal, needs something more… it needs eternal support and encouragement. The kind that only Jesus and His lovingkindness offers.
So in a way, I am thankful for those rare, horrible days like yesterday. They keep me aware of the shortness of life and the magnitude of Heaven. And how desperately I want to grab my children’s hands and run with them towards Jesus.
“…fixing our eyes upon Jesus,
the author and finisher of our faith…”
Hebrews 12:2
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