Motherhood…a time of intense sacrifice, love, and emotions. Also a time of intense sleep-deprivation, screw-ups, and winging it.
When you pair several non-sleepy kiddos with one very sleepy momma, there’s no telling what each day will hold!
And with that, here are 20 things that I have literally said and done throughout my own motherhood. You can all relate, right??
I have literally…
- Told my 2-year-old who is practically begging me to potty-train her to “just go in your diaper.”
- Peered into the room to see my 2 boys fighting, turned around, and tip-toed somewhere else.
- Allowed the “5 Billion Seconds Rule” when it comes to food dropped in public.
- Wiped their nose, mouth, and/or bottom with my shirt.
- Hidden in the closet from my children. Many, many times.
- Taken a shower way past the point of any hot water, just for a little R&R.
- Secretly eaten the majority of their Halloween candy.
- Cleaned pacifiers that fell on the ground with my own mouth.
- Driven all around town until I found a grocery store with an available “car buggy.”
- Accidentally stolen groceries that rolled underneath the carseat which I had placed inside the buggy.
- Switched pillow cases with my husband so that he slept on the one covered in our baby’s spit up.
- Convinced my 2 boys to stop sucking their thumbs by showing them semi-scary pictures of what it looks like to have braces installed. (Thank you, Google Images.)
- Thrown away really annoying toys, no matter the price.
- Gone to Chick-Fil-A to let my children play in the glassed-in, sound-proof playroom for hours. With absolutely no intention of buying anything.
- Rewarded my kids for good behavior in the grocery store by giving them 5 minutes to play on/inside the shelves of the toilet paper aisle.
- Fallen asleep in the OB-GYN waiting room.
- Given my kids candy for breakfast.
- And lunch…
- In the same day… (It was actually what yours truly wanted for breakfast and lunch.)
- Suddenly switched sides of the bed with my husband one day. He never knew why. It was because that particular side was the one the kids got to first when they came in our room at the crack of dawn on Saturday asking for a bowl of yogurt with granola sprinkled on top. My husband knows now, I guess.
Are there any that you can relate to? Please share your own motherhood hilarity!
And some other posts along the same lines…
- “Let It Go” – Mommy Parody
- Then and Now: Kids Change Everything
- Six Weird Things That Make A Momma’s Day
- When I Was A New Mom And Everything Freaked Me Out
Photo credit: here
Hi, my name is Lauren. I am the wife of one fine man and the momma of four (huge) young children – three boys and one princess! I love all of them. I mostly clean up messes and feed people all day, and it’s really fun to write about it. Jesus is the rock of my family – we love and serve a mighty King! I hope you leave here full of hope that “tired” can be good.
Suanne
October 10, 2015 at 7:22 am (9 years ago)1.Once shared a sleeve of Chips Ahoy chocolate chip cookies with my oldest son…for breakfast.
2. Told same son that Toys r Us was Santa’s Showcase and toys could only be returned there and not bought.
Lauren Souers
October 14, 2015 at 6:49 pm (9 years ago)Hilarious! 🙂
Stacey
October 10, 2015 at 5:13 pm (9 years ago)Placed my tantrum throwing todler outside in the backyard to continue her fit while I vacuumed the sunroom… Only to open the door to let her back in too many minutes later (no idea how long) to find I had shut her fingers in the said door. The crying never changed from “I am mad I can’t do what I want”, to “you have smashed my fingers in the door”. I had no idea but found myself crying with her while sitting and rocking on the back porch. Yeah, thankfully God somehow helps them forget those years!
Lauren Souers
October 14, 2015 at 6:50 pm (9 years ago)I totally feel you on being grateful for what they don’t remember. 🙂