Delivery Room Sanctification

“For who has known the mind of the Lord so as to instruct Him?…”  2 Corinthians 2:16

For the past nine months, I realize now that I had been “instructing” God.  I made plans with prideful fists closed tightly around them.  And what made this sin so difficult to recognize up until now was that the plans I had been making were “sweet” plans.

Throughout my pregnancy, I eagerly planned out exactly how I wanted to announce the gender of our third “mystery” child.  I made a baby wreath that welcomed either a boy or a girl.  I had a list detailing everything I wanted my husband to buy while I was in the hospital, in the event that we had a girl.  I had even told all my friends that once the baby was born, we weren’t going to announce the gender…if they wanted to know what we had, they had to come visit us at the hospital to find out!

I also took serious control of my diet and exercise while pregnant.  I wanted to guarantee myself an easy, breezy delivery and a swift recovery (as well as fit into my old clothes asap).

Those were my “innocent” plans and fun ideas.  What made them not so innocent was the fact that they were an idol.  Never once did I consult my Heavenly Father.  Never once did I offer up my plans as an offering.  Never once did I loosen my controlling grip on my ideas.

So here is how it actually all went down:

Late Thursday night / Friday morning I woke up hubby with the exciting “It’s time to go!” announcement.  My dad was at the house already, so we jumped in the car and headed to the hospital.

Upon arriving, the nurses confirmed that I was in labor and said to expect delivery by midday Friday.  Yay!  So far so good!

About twenty seconds later, I started vomiting quite violently.  Assuming it was nerves, the nurses told me to lay back and relax.  Everyone quickly realized that it wasn’t nerves, however, when my husband joined in the vomiting fun a few minutes later.

Stomach cramps rivaling the pain of contractions set in moments later.  Let me recap at this point:  IN LABOR while vomiting and being attacked by the worst stomach cramps imaginable.  So far not so good.

A few hours later, baby is ready to meet the messy, germy world that I am creating for her.  I am literally throwing up while she is being delivered.  My husband tries his best to stand next to me, but he has no choice but to rush to the bathroom to throw up some more.  He missed the delivery and the announcement of our very first daughter.

Instead of being handed my new baby, they quickly rush her out of the throw-up factory and take her to a sterile environment.  Once I had been attended to, the really bad news is handed to us.

My husband is asked to leave the hospital.  Leave the hospital!?!  He hadn’t even laid eyes on his precious new daughter yet!  But that is what had to happen.  He was a contagious risk to a newborn.  I was also told that I would not be allowed to receive visitors, and my baby could only come into my room when it was time to feed her.

Goodbye plans.  Hello lesson learned.

Being all alone for 2 1/2 days in a hospital room allows for a lot of thinking time.  Apparently that is just what I needed.  For nine months, I had kept my mind so preoccupied with plans and ideas that I didn’t ever STOP and quietly consult the Lord.  So He did what was necessary to get my mind to be still for a few days.

Hard lesson?  YES!  But I love what I learned because of it.  First of all, I was reminded that I am not in control, and God is.  And He is in control of much more than just the big things…He is in control of every tiny facet of life, down to the delivery room details.

I was also reminded of my deep besetting sin: my sin of control.  I will probably struggle with this for the rest of my life, but that doesn’t mean that I stop fighting against it.

Finally, I was reminded of my need for still and quiet.  The precious times I got to visit with my new daughter in the quiet hospital room will be a special memory for  all of my life.  I love that I didn’t leave the hospital exhausted because of stimulus overload…thank you, Father.

My Father knows best.  He broke me down, and built me back up.  My Father loves me.

Lauren Souers

Hi, my name is Lauren. I am the wife of one fine man and the momma of four (huge) young children – three boys and one princess! I love all of them. I mostly clean up messes and feed people all day, and it’s really fun to write about it. Jesus is the rock of my family – we love and serve a mighty King! I hope you leave here full of hope that “tired” can be good.